The Las Vegas Courtesan

Really? I have been here in Vegas the whole time. When I first started out blogging I remember following other sex-worker bloggers and I noticed how some would post every day, then only sometimes, and eventually fall off the face of the earth. No good-bye, just abandon their site.

I didn’t understand how that could happen, but I guess it happened to me, in a way. I still work, I’m still around town, I just… got a little bored with being online so much. Reading emails, replying, posting stuff, tweeting… it can be a lot of work and you don’t realize it—then other parts of your normal day get sidelined because you want to finish all of the other things as well. What I have been thinking is… I need a goal. Everyone needs a goal! Why am I doing this? I have been featured in many awesome publications and online sites, but I need something to fulfill my inner artist: Do something artistic… working towards a goal that many people and my long-time fans would enjoy.

So my idea? A book. Not just any book, but one that would feature stunning nudes and short stories to accompany them. I know many have told me over the years that I should write a book, but some novel length feature doesn’t interest me. So I am going to put some ideas together — a plan — and a maybe a Kickstarter-like project to get this sort of thing underway. I should have done this long ago!

And now… a picture! At last! So the story behind this quick shot was a funny one. I recently was sitting outside with a short skirt on at an outdoor restaurant with some chrome chairs that had holes in the seat. I sat chatting away for a few hours, but little did I know that the heat and sweat and gravity had pulled my skin through the little holes. It didn’t hurt at all, but the next day I turned around while getting out of the shower and thought “OH MY GOD” and imagined only the worst skin desease ever was attacking my butt. Then I realized, it was that dumb uncomfortable chair I sat in the night before that wanted something for me to remember it by. Sneaky chair!

Based on my tweet from tonight, I just had to make a blog post about it because it’s just too funny for 140 characters. I give the guy at least an A for effort in trying English. Here’s how the conversation went down as soon as I entered the room:
“Hi! How are you?”
“Yes how much are you charge”
“Oh Nice to meet you too!” and shook his hand. Nothing bugs me more than people who respond my greeting with a “how much” question. He looked at me like I was crazy for my response.
After asking where he was from in China, I wrote down on paper how it worked: $150 is a fee for me to dance and I work for tips.
“Oh no I think it’s fast food altogether”
“Fast food? Did you just say fast food?”
“Yes, fast food” he pronounced much clearer this time.
“What, fast food like McDonalds? I don’t deliver McDonalds I’m sorry”
“Yes fast food it’s mean make-a love from 14 million”
“Did you just say 14 million?”
“Yes 14 million, long time ago. If you can’t do fast food for $150 the I will be grace you with $5 and you leave”
“$5? You’ll have to do better than that”

He ends up giving me $20 for my troubles and a groping hug, but the crazy laugh I let out the whole way to my car was worth a lot more. Thanks for the good laugh on a slow night! I want to find out where he translated the word sex into fast food.

I started writing this on vacation on a text file on my phone because it struck me in some random place in the world one thing that I love about my job: freedom.

I forget if it was in an email or on twitter reply, but one person asked me a “what if” question: What if you quit working, what would you miss the most about your job?

This. I would miss this. Being able to take a vacation and then extend it for whatever amount of time that I wanted. Go wherever I wanted and no one calling me saying I have to get back to work. I had one phonegirl call me since I left to see how was my vacation, I sent her an expensive text back saying that I’m fine and will be back who knows when. I’m off to explore the world.

I would miss not having to tell or explain to people where when or why I am going somewhere, for an extended amount of time. Put in notices in advance to someone or clients (if I owned my own company). There is nothing right now holding me back from going anywhere at anytime when I want. I don’t have to wait for a paycheck when I get back to reset or if I went over vacation days. When I get back I can work and earn immediately.

I know since I’ve been gone one girl was going to leave Vegas and go find a job (adding: I found out since returning that she really has moved on,) in another state and live with relatives. I asked her the same question: What are you going to miss the most? She said the work schedule and making up her own time slots that she preferred. She liked working the swing shift, 5pm to about midnight. She took off when she wanted to spend time at home and always took off Sundays. She has a strong personality and she was concerned that she wouldn’t do well with the sudden change of having a real boss and job where she didn’t earn much. Also the change of earning a paycheck that came after a certain time, not just cash-in-hand. These are some of the same things that would worry me, but I know she could do it and glad she is… best of luck to her.

Now I am back, it’s been hard to be motivated to get back to work. I am feeling better, but the change back to heat and the worst case of jet lag I have ever had (I’m guessing it’s because I was gone for so long,) I’m sure I’ll get back in the swing of things tonight or tomorrow. Now that I think of it, preferably tomorrow because I don’t know if I can deal with the drunken pool party goers on Sundays who have stayed awake since Friday night. Tomorrow it is.

It’s seems like it’s more rare for me to be asked something new or to have a call go a different way than the many before. I always like the calls that surprise me and break up the monotony of this job (believe it or not it can get quite boring!) I went on a call in the afternoon at Planet Hollywood. The phone girl had a story before I went in. For the record I don’t like story–telling time before I go on calls because that means there is some excuse or convoluted situation that I have to work around instead of an easy “Here’s the info,” now go upstairs and make money.  The story was the guy in the room does not know I am coming and was booked by another friend as I surprise, but the guy who booked left money in the room for me. Left money in the room for me? Where? How does he know what to leave? I’m assuming he only left the company fee in the room and I’m going on a treasure hunt just to find it. Then this creates an awkward situation for me when I have to explain, “Yea that money your friend left doesn’t go to me, I strip for that, anything else you must pay for,” which sounds like a total bummer of a surprise. This whole mental conversation takes note before I ask the phone girl, “Left money for me? Where? Did the friend know how this works?” She says, “He said he’s been to Vegas before and I have no idea about the location of the money.” See, this is why I don’t like story time before calls.

I go upstairs and knock. Guy has a surprised look on his face, but is on the phone when I come in. He finishes his business conversation while handing me the folded piece of paper marked, “Give this to delivery guy.” Inside is the company fee, nothing more. See, this is what I feared! He finally gets off the phone and I said, “Surprise! I’m your delivery!” he was definitely shocked and yet happy (some surprises have sort of panicked and declined.) He said, “My brother said I had a delivery for my birthday, but I had no idea!” He goes to his computer bag and pulls out a card that says on the front, “Open this when delivery guy gets there.” I cross my fingers that some sort of tip is in there from brother-of-the-year. He asks, “Should I open this now? He said to when you got here.” Yes yes YES! He does, and thankfully a decent tip is in there. Brother scores some points for knowing really how this works and not $30 in an envelope. The now shaking birthday boy says, “Man, I need a drink. So I get to have fun with you now, naked?” Yes, and then some.

Here’s the real surprise to me, this whole time I thought the brother was staying in Vegas as well, but in a different room or different hotel. Come to find out he wasn’t even in the US. The brother had stopped by his house the night before and stuffed the card and message in his laptop bag, then informed him of it later. That was one talented planning job, and probably more than any other call before.