The Las Vegas Courtesan

I am shocked sometimes at how immature grown adults can be when it comes to sexual acts! It’s sometimes hard not to laugh, too. I got an email from a lady coming into Las Vegas as a surprise gift to her husband for his birthday. She wanted to also surprise him by having their first three-some experience by contacting me to prearrange the appointment for 10:30 on a Friday night. I set that time aside but their flight was late, they had a prepaid package at Scores Las Vegas Strip Club (which was a waste) and pushed me back until about 1am. I was kind of peeved because this was after all, a Friday night. I finally convince them to go back to their room since she was complaining about Scores so much. After all… I am way more entertaining than a strip club!

I show up (he was shocked at his surprise from his wife), chat for a minute, make sure they pass my tests, and started off with an okay tip. I explain to them that couples tend to cost more because there are, after all, two people involved. They tipped me more to get the business out of the way and we start having fun… well I at least tried to make them have fun. By this time I had been there for 25 minutes. Both of them seemed to whine and bitch every so often because of their experience at Scores earlier and now they are spending more money. Sorry that me trying to give you a blow job and please your wife isn’t better than Scores. I watch them have sex and try to get their mood up, but it was no use. When I looked at the clock, an hour had gone by and I said that our time is up… which was actually almost an hour and a half of total time. The husband sighed and went off to the bathroom and slammed the door. I got dressed and asked her what he was doing. She said, “I don’t think he’s coming out until you leave”. Huh? Until I leave? I kind of shouted out to him “Are you coming out?” and there was no reply. Is this how a man that is almost 50 years old throws a temper tantrum? Unbelievable and hilarious! Some people are never happy, that’s for sure.

Not too long after the event in the last blog entry I went to a call at the Tropicana Hotel by myself and the phone girl informed me it was a couple call. I do entertain couples but my general rule is that I don’t perform oral sex on girls… don’t get me wrong I love girls, I just don’t want to hassle with using dental dam (plus I am sure it doesn’t feel that great anyway). Luckily most couples aren’t interested in that anyway…

So, I show up and there are two guys, stoned out of their mind and they explain to me that it’s their friend’s bachelor party. I was confused, “I thought this was for a couple”, I said. They replied, “Oh it is, they are just in the next room”. The guy and girl come out, one a voluptuous girl and a skinny short guy who is more stoned/drunk than everyone else in the room. The collecting of the fee and discussing of the tips took forever but I was determined to leave with something since my night hadn’t been too great. In the end, the couple and I went to the second bedroom… giving him a hand job while they made out since they didn’t have much of a budget. The whole time the mood was kind of odd and dull but in the end he said it was “awesome”. As long as they are happy, then I am happy! I have to say though, I have never seen so much pubic hair in my life until then. ☺

They have been advertising the fight for months and months, every showroom in Las Vegas owned by MGM/Mirage is showing the event closed circuit, and the fans have all flooded into town. Personally, I am ready for the darn thing to be over with, but if the money I made last night is any indication of the money in town this weekend then I hope it never ends!

Around midnight to 1am I was getting pretty darn frustrated with one agency I work for. I have been working for them for years and don’t want to lose the priority I have built up with them (it always takes some time for your ability to make money become well known to the girls answering the phones and dispatch the calls), but some of the business practices and new fees have made it difficult to make calls work. There have been several nights recently where I have gone on calls for them for hours during prime times, only to be wasted on calls that didn’t answer, couldn’t get the fee, or got the fee and the client didn’t want to tip which means I walk away with nothing. These are the reasons why a lot of girls don’t like working for services but in my opinion, this way of making money is a little bit safer in Vegas… especially right now.  This company solely works from taxi cab and limo referrals so the fees are higher because the drivers get such a huge kick back. Recently the fee was upped from $200 ($150 to the driver and $50 to the company) to $250-$300 ($200-$250 to the driver STILL $50 to the company) due to competition from other companies stealing drivers. Its insane, and I know every one else reading this will be shocked. You can see why sometimes its hard to collect these fees when all the customer is getting is a strip and I am walking away with nothing if they don’t tip above that fee. So now I am sure many will ask, so why do you even work for this company? It is one of about five that I work for and even though their fees are high, I still do make money from them (though lately some of these nights I run around for nothing) and when I get tired and frustrated of running around for them, I sometimes call off and focus more on other services that I work for.

Anyway… there was a whole point to that diversion. I was getting frustrated last night, like I said, and was really close to calling it quits with them for the night around 5:30am because I was missing calls from other services that I thought would be easier to deal with. I gave in and finally said, ok one more chance but this better not be a waste of time. She swore it wouldn’t. I show up at THEhotel at Mandalay Bay and it turns out to be 4 girls, 2 guys and the agency fee is $250 a girl. Jesus Christ, I thought it was supposed to be good?! That means the fee is $1,000 total? That’s absolutely insane. We go upstairs and the two guys are here from Puerto Rico for the De La Hoya v. Mayweather fight. After chatting we actually collect the fee of $1,000. All four of us are kind of shocked and start talking tips after we all split up: 2 girls for each guy. The other girl and I get some money upfront to start giving him the minimum hand job when we finally convince him of giving us more so he can have what he is requesting: having sex with the both of us. Though this is probably every guy’s fantasy, it is quite annoying to pull off with two prostitutes. It’s a total mood killer for the guy when we are going through condoms, getting him to wash up or washing ourselves, and constant trips to the bathroom. The guy has sex with her first for about 2 minutes before the alcohol in his system makes him lose his erection, then after more washing and condom changing he tries having sex with me which lasted even shorter before his erection was lost. After an hour he hasn’t had an orgasm and realizes maybe he did drink too much the last night.  Even though that was frustrating, it ended up being a good end to the already decent night.

Lesson everyone should learn? Don’t spend thousands of dollars when you have drunk too much to enjoy your fantasy with two girls.

I am talking about the real deal race cars that will cruise through the streets of downtown Las Vegas and I am sure will create one heck of a traffic disaster for everyone trying to get to court this week (thankfully not me!) Then again, I probably should pay close attention to those road closures since I am sure I will be going downtown for calls at the hotels. Rumor from an office manager at a company I work for said it would be around 100,000 people flocking to Vegas for the race. Hopefully will be a better crowd than the NASCAR fans that come into town for the Daimler-Chrysler 400 race during early March.

The past few days have been super slow and very strangely unpredictable. I did okay for a Sunday night, but last night I had two calls that ended up not panning out to be anything, nor did I have the opportunity to make any cash. My one hope last night ended up going downstairs with his credit card only to not be able to pull anything out due to unknown issues. Tonight hasn’t been going anywhere at all as far as making money. I had called-on early in the afternoon (calling on meaning I call all the services I work for to say that I am ready and available to take jobs) due to last night’s failure and ended up going on a early but small bachelor party call to the Imperial Palace. The other girl showed up just as I was collecting the company fee and we started talking about pricing for a typical bachelor party. The guys said that it was out of their range and then informed us that they wanted to spend $20 each (which would be about $60 total) on us to do a party. The other girl and I exchanged some blank looks since we just explained how a good party works along with typical tipping. Luckily we got to stick around and made a couple hundred each in the end to give a good party to the bachelor. The friends departed the room to supposedly get more funds for us to stay longer and left us alone with the stiff-dicked bachelor. At that time we hadn’t been paid enough each to do sexual acts with him, so we continued to dance. The bachelor gave up his last bit of money and the other girl started rubbing on his dick through his goofy Scooby-doo boxers as I was turned around wiggling my butt while rubbing his leg. I felt his legs quiver and asked, “Did you just…. Cum ?” and looked at the other girl. He shook his head “yes” and smiled sheepishly. I didn’t want to make the guy feel bad, but me and the second girl couldn’t help but giggle quietly when we ran to the bathroom to change and wash our hands. The group of guys finally reentered and said that they only got a wad of ones from downstairs after being gone for so long. By looking at the bachelor’s facial expression, they decided he had enough fun and we could leave. I don’t care if they just had some one-dollar bills… it’s still money, right? Could definitely have gone to use for when I have to tip the phone girl out.

I am thinking happy thoughts for the weekend. Can’t be any worse than it is right now