The Las Vegas Courtesan

So one of my readers reminded me recently, “Hey you never finished that series about your previous arrests!”. Ah thanks for reminding me, and now that I am back from yet another trip, I will continue the saga. First of all I want to rant about this regular couple who I have discussed about standing me up before in this entry. Maybe I should have learned my lesson from that instance, but they had since proven themselves to keep an appointment and made up for it monetarily. So I was not supposed to fly back from my trip until today but I received a call from said clients who wanted to meet up last night. I change my flight to the tune of almost $200 and guess what they do? Stand me up again. I am still sour about it so I called on with my agencies and the night ended up being a complete dud. As you can see, I am still bitter about it and they have not called me back. I told them I had changed my flight for them, but apparently that went unnoticed. That is the first time I have changed my flight to come back to work early, and it actually flopped. Anyway, on with my story!

So my second run in with the law after this entry occurred two months later in December of that year. At the time craigslist wasn’t a terrible place and they had just started doing busts on there and figuring out it was a mecca of prostitutes for the taking. December is super slow after the rodeo and I decided to try to make up for the slack by posting a few ads a few days in a row and just be really careful. I posted one ad and I swear, it was 15 minutes later a woman called me in reference to the advertisement. I already felt somewhat relieved since it was a woman calling for her husband and herself, and the only thing that made me feel peculiar about the call was how she asked if my fee was for “full service”. I graciously replied, “I’m sorry but that term is eluding to prostitution and that is illegal in Clark County.” She apologized and didn’t mean to offend me but would still like for me to come over and meet them. Okay, sounds good to me! I got their information about staying at Caesar’s, it verified, and I headed over there. I knock at the door and a nicely dressed and polite African-American woman answers the door. She looks like someone who would be a secretary at your junior high with her glasses and simple outfit, and her husband is dressed nice as well and could have played football in high school but now is the business type. I sit down and talk with them how they are from Oakland and I take a look around the room at some of the sex toys on the side tables (of course now seem very staged) and immediately tell them just for coming over I do a strip. I get down to my thong and invite them to touch me immediately. The woman hops up, giggles and fondles my breasts while the man just gently touched with the back of his hand. Doesn’t seem too odd, especially since she was so eager to grab me.

So I sit down and she starts saying how she doesn’t really want anything to do with it and how I don’t have to go down on her. I said, that’s all right because I don’t perform oral on women, I only dance and touch. She says, “okay well I want you to just focus on him and play with him and maybe some oral sex on him”. I immediately tell her I don’t like talking about things like that. So she instead asks me what do I normally get tipped for couples and I told her. Just then the phone rings and she runs to the restroom to answer it. That I thought was odd but it didn’t really alarm me since both of them seemed to pass my little groping test. She comes back in and apologizes and says, “Well lets just get started, $XXX for some dances and maybe a little blowjob for him”. I forget how exactly I answered but it was along the lines of, “okay lets just get started” and not specifically saying yes to the oral sex. The man pulls out a wad of bills and starts counting…

I hear the door open and turn around to see Vice coming in and saying I’m under arrest for soliciting and to put my clothes back on. They hurry me off to the other room because yet another girl I think was on her way up. I think why the phone rang was the cops telling her, “You need to wrap this up and get her to agree”. So as soon as I am dressed in the other room the head officer (who was at the previous bust) informs me that I am being charged with TWO counts since there were two undercover officers in the other room. Even though I had turned the woman down for any prostitution, I was still being charged with soliciting her. Bunch of bull, of course! I went to jail and was released about 24 hours later on bail and would have been released under my own recognizance, but they were so slow that day.

So what happened with this case, and how did it almost screw up the previous one? In the other case they had offered me a plea bargain but the catch was I had to stay out of trouble, remember? I had not accepted the terms yet so it didn’t really count at that point. The lawyer thought if I accepted the plea and finished everything before the court date of this offense, that they wouldn’t conflict nor would it be in the system yet. He was right, I finished the requirements that week and had the other case dismissed the same day this one was going to court. So when the DA asked what was the deal with the case from October, my lawyer replied that I had finished the terms and was being submitted that day. So what did the young and stupid new DA do? Dismissed this case entirely right then and there. I was told that was really lucky and of course I am glad it was dropped too.

Sounds funny but it’s true. After working out here for years I could write down every hotel’s room number sequences, tell you which tower it’s in, if there is security downstairs, where the elevators are, and other useless trivia. Well, I take that back, I can never get Caesar’s Palace room numbers right and downtown hotels can get tricky since I don’t go there all that often. As many rooms as I have seen I should start working for hotel websites and doing their reviews of the rooms. I guess I would have something to fall back on when I quit doing my current job. Ok… well maybe not.

I’m going to do something different and kind of humorous and rate some of Las Vegas’ hotel rooms from a whore’s point of view. I’d love to hear your input too if I missed anything

Hotel Room I Was Most Surprised About:
The Fremont Hotel and Casino. As far as downtown casinos go, The Golden Nugget has been the nicest ones downtown for a while and especially more so now that Landry’s owns them. I went to the Fremont on a call and felt like I was in a different hotel when I got off of the elevator and was surprised when I walked into the room. The company that owns this hotel caters to a lot of Hawaiians so generally all of the customers I have seen there have been nice and can afford to have a good time. By no means is this one of the nicest hotels in Vegas, but I am sure it’s a bargain for the room. I have to also mention the suites at Barbary Coast. Their regular rooms are ho hum but I have been in two suites that have totally shocked me on how nice they were.

Most Overrated Hotel:
Man this is a difficult one.. I am saying it’s a tie between the MGM (excluding the new West Wing hotel rooms which are awesome) and the Four Seasons. Yes I really did just say the famous Four Seasons. I might take my review on the Four Seasons back after the next time I go there because the pictures on their website of the rooms look much better now. The last time I went on a call there (been in the suites and regular rooms) I was surprised at how plain and bare the rooms were. The regular room looked almost identical to the standard Mandalay Bay rooms (which is the same building, just certain floors are for Four Seasons guests) but a little simpler. As far as the MGM goes, they tend to charge an arm and a leg for rooms that need to be updated and are just simple, but they can get away with it because of the events they hold there makes it convenient for tourists. I have also been in customer’s rooms that try to order any sort of room service and the wait always seems to be about an hour. I personally try to stay out of the MGM due to their extreme dislike of working girls like me. If you’re a john and want girls to come to you, I would book somewhere else since so many girls refuse to step foot in there. You will probably end up with someone you don’t like or someone who is real new.

Worst Hotel Room:
The Excalibur. This hotel should be just blown up just because it is an eye sore and the rooms are even worse than the gaudy exterior. The rooms have a horrible 70’s brown carpet and everything else is just ugly. Even though the Tropicana is pretty darn bad, I would much rather stay there than be run over by strollers at the Excalibur. It seems like they are doing some remodeling but I don’t think it will be much improvement unless they gutted the whole place. I have to note that I think this hotel is just the worst on the Strip, though some downtown hotels can beat the Excalibur hands down for the worst.

Last but not least…

The Overall Best Room:

I would have to give that to The Hotel at Mandalay Bay. Yes the rooms at Bellagio, Wynn, Venetian, Caesar’s and Paris are all nice but I think this room gives you the most for a standard room. Every room there is a true suite (unlike the Rio which is advertised as an all-suite hotel but really they are just one large room with a couch) and has a living room area with a separate bedroom. Every room has a nice mini-bar, full bathroom with tub and shower, half bath in living area, a desk with a fax machine, two flat panel TV’s, and one small LCD TV in the bathroom. It’s has a more modern look and what’s even better is the lack of security downstairs to sneak up your date for the night.