The Las Vegas Courtesan

I had an up and down night last night. A bunch of calls where phone girls were sending me on bull and taking advantage of my patience and calmer attitude . I sometime have a hard time telling them no or asking a bunch of questions about the legitimacy of the call (no one likes to work with a bitch for an escort) and a few girls were totally using that to send me to downtown then to the other end of the strip and they all be a waste of an hour or so.

I called off for that service and got a call from another one to the Motel 6 across from the MGM Grand. Hooray. That place can be creepy but a lot of people go there to escape whoever is staying with them in their regular hotel room. This client was escaping his sister and brother in law at the MGM Signature. I go in and he is steadily drinking a bottle of champagne with his shaky hand and plastic some-assembly-required champagne glass. I collect the fee and start talking about tips. He is pretty limited to his funds and the nearest ATM is a block away so we just decide to just work with what he has and that he fully knew what he was getting for his money. Half way through he acted like he never knew he wasn’t getting sex and was disappointed. I hate it when clients do that half way through a session only to ruin the vibe and their erection by acting dumb about what we solidly agreed to before hand. We leave on good terms and he begs me for a hug as I am walking out.

Anyway, I go to the service office and turn in my fee and watch TV for a bit. Almost a whole hour after I left the room he client calls the office to tell them that I have no soul. I hear her reply, “Well you were the one who called us, sir. What does that make you? She only came over at your request.” He apparently repeated back, “Well she has no soul” and the girl on the phone back said, “Oh really? Then what does that make you?” and hung up. I don’t know how he got from begging me for a hug as I left to me not having a soul. He wanted a girlfriend I suppose and nothing makes some people happy. Sad

Well I say that but I have only had 2 calls who were actually here for the concrete show (one ended up working out and the other was okay money). I don’t know what happened around town but all of the sudden things started picking up and my phone starting ringing. Most importantly those calls that I went to were actually turning out to be decent money calls instead of a whole bunch of pranksters.

Escorting in Las Vegas is amazing. There is no rhyme or reason to the ebb and flow of this town. One day will be crazy busy and you see HORDES of people on the Strip but yet all of the agencies and my web ads are quiet. Not a peep. Then the next week it will be a huge convention but they just don’t spend money. Then the next week it seems like no one is walking around the Strip but the calls I get will be scarce but huge money. No way of predicting things. I would be better off predicting the weather in Las Vegas than I would predicting how much money I will make a night.

Glad to see things are picking up. I just hope I don’t jinx myself.

So I lied the other day and said it was slow here in Vegas. I just *thought* it was slow then! Friday night proved to be a chorus of crickets chirping and I ended up hanging out with some friends later on in the night which I regret now since I missed Saturday day and night. I also ended up not getting my butt out to the Nevada caucus at 11am due to… well I probably couldn’t drive.  Shame on me. All of the harassing phone calls by Hillary Clinton’s and Barack Obama’s campaign and my local precinct organizer didn’t pay off because really… Saturday morning was a dumb time to have a caucus in Las Vegas. Really. They should have had it at 7pm on a Monday or something. By that time we have all sobered up from the weekend, people who have regular jobs during the daytime can go and the night owls should be awake by then. Simple plan! If that was the time then I am sure 90% of residents would have been there! Make it 100% if you add a cash bar with martini’s poured by our randy Mayor Oscar Goodman and some bar nuts. Bingo! Biggest turn out in *America*

I had actually considered showing up drunken and in slutty clothes but that would have been a $20 cab ride from where I was. I figured that would have been very Vegas and American of me to show up in that condition… but alas, I don’t think I would have been able to stand it. Cast a vote drunk? Yes… Stay for a caucus thing that takes more than 5 minutes? No…. that’s too much drunken effort.  Well I definitely will be present in November.. and with bells on.

Here ya go… my rule #2 of etiquette when calling a girl in Las Vegas

#2:  When you are quoted a minimum on the phone, have it when the girl arrives.

It’s as easy as that! You’d think all of the shopping around and talking people do when trying to find a girl that they would have at least the amount quoted on the phone. Otherwise, why bother? When customers call me to inquire how it all works in Las Vegas I quote them a minimum price to get me there, naked, comfortable and start some dances. Since I am very careful about my choice of words this is all I am able to really solicit legally over the phone. I explain that any other entertainment and time is negotiated in person and in private (I have to make sure that I am not going to be soliciting a vice officer) but if for whatever reason things don’t work out when I first show up.. I leave at no charge to people.

My #1 pet peve is when people call me and say that my minimum is okay and understand what that all entails. Then when finally meeting up with said client, they don’t even have the minimum and want to try to re-negotiate that price. I make it clear and they agree and understand.. then don’t? No girl likes their time to be wasted and you never know when you’ll get a girl who has a short fuse. I don’t but not every girl is nice as sugar and spice.

This is a very important rule! Always be courteous and have the minimum if you schedule an appointment.